What I wish someone had told us….

First off, I want you to know this is about Hubs vasectomy yesterday. Things I wish SOMEONE would have said. Things I think should have at least been included in the post op papers he brought home. Things that would have saved me from calling 911. Nothing too graphic, but maybe more information that some people might want.

So, as we know, Hubs went for his vasectomy yesterday afternoon. As far as I know, it was mostly uneventful. Some freezing, some snipping, some stitching and he was ready to come home. He got home at about 3:40 pm. This is where things start getting interesting.

Before he got home, I was the good wife. I made him juice, made up the couch for him, made sure the ice packs were frozen and started supper. When he got home I went through his post op bag, got him his pain killers and helped him get comfy. Well, wouldn’t you know it, he needed to pee.

On his way to the washroom he asked me if I could run upstairs and grab him some pj pants, no problem. He goes into the washroom and I go upstairs. As I am coming down the stairs (I might have been at the bottom of the stairs, I don’t remember) I hear three loud bangs coming from the direction of the bathroom. As you can imagine, I panicked. I ran to the bathroom and opened the door to my husband passed out on the bathroom floor shaking. Before my brain could process what I was seeing he came too and asked me where he was… Um What?… If I thought I was panicked before this kicked it up a couple notches. After talking to him for a couple seconds, he knew where he was, although he wasn’t sure what had happened.

Our bathroom is really tiny. From the way he was lying on the floor, I assumed he likely hit his head on the sink on his way down (although he was lucky and his head landed on the new bag of toilet paper I hadn’t put away yet) While talking to him trying to determine if he needed an ambulance or not, he started complaining about his back hurting and his arms being tingly. Well that sealed it for me. I went and took my phone from Alex who was playing games on it and called 911.

At some point through all this I put Zoey in her highchair to get her out of the way and Alex at the table to play a game… I’m not sure when I did this, but Mommy instincts were there and I didn’t want them getting in the way. Nick was still napping at this point. I had been planning on waking him up after I got Hubs settled.

So about 5 minutes after I call 911 (it seemed faster, and slower at the same time, but my call log says it was about 5 minutes) 6 huge guys come barreling into my house to see Hubs. The kids were pretty indifferent to the whole thing, although Alex thought it was neat there was a firetruck and ambulance right outside the house!

Thankfully, Hubs was fine. They didn’t make him go into the hospital. Just talked to him for awhile, helped him up and onto the couch and gave us some information that I think should have been included somewhere by his Dr.

So what happened? It turns out, that after a vasectomy, it’s going to hurt a bit when you pee. Something with the tubes, and how it all works. You are supposed to sit while you are peeing. Not stand. Well, Hubs wasn’t told this. He didn’t think anything of it. When he had to go he went the way he normally would. When he started, it hurt so he tried to stop it. Which put more pressure on everything. Which caused him to get dizzy and faint.

For all the people I talked to about a vasectomy, NO ONE mentioned this. Not one single person. After it happened, I talked to a couple people… thinking this is weird, how come this happened to him and no one else? Turns out, a few of the same people I had talked to before, their husbands had complained about being light headed and dizzy when peeing for the first couple days afterwards and had made the decision on their own to sit when using the washroom.

WHY DIDN’T ANYONE SHARE THIS INFORMATION?!?!?

I am glad that Hubs is okay. Everything is fine. And my anxiety and stress levels have gone down. I don’t know if this information is going to help anyone but I feel like it needs to be out there.

*** Update: I called the Urologist who did the procedure on hubs, and I was told that this is a common complaint and they are in the process of updating the post op papers that are sent home with patients. I’m not even sure what to make of that right now. ***

Love, hugs and more to come later!
Lynn

A bit of a Sunday night rant

I don’t normally post twice in one day. In fact, I try not too. I try to make my posts mean a little more than just random ramblings because I am bored. And, you know, three kids keeps me pretty busy so I often don’t have time to post numerous times a day, in fact, it usually takes me sitting down more than once to finish a post. But today I am angry and I need to rant. I am afraid if I don’t get these feelings out I am going to lose my freaking mind. And no one wants to see that happen.

I have three kids. This is a well known and, quite frankly, obvious fact. (Especially if you see me out with said children) But I am getting really really agitated with people’s comments about us having another child. I don’t really mind when people ask us if we are planning on having another child. I am honest and tell them we don’t know yet. (We agreed we don’t want to tell people no, because we don’t want people to make comments if we decide that we do, and vice versa) Because, quite honestly, we DON’T know yet if we want another child. It’s a big decision and while I am not ready to be on board with a vasectomy, I am also not ready to be on board with going through another pregnancy. Zoey is 2 months old.

So people ask, and we are honest and say we don’t know. Then we get the comments like these ones: (and this is what is really agitating and hurting me)

‘I don’t know why you would even consider another one, you obviously already have your hands full’ –said to me by a close friend when the boys were getting antsy waiting for Daddy to bring them their lunch while we were at the mall and I was entertaining them with toys while Zoey slept 

‘If you guys do have another one, make sure you wait until the two older ones are out of diapers. Diapers are expensive.’ Hmm really? Are they? Are they really? Obviously I know this. And obviously at least Alex would be out of diapers. The kid is 2.5 years old and since I am not having a baby tomorrow, I’m sure it’s safe to say I won’t have 4 in diapers. 

‘Don’t you think you’re stretched thin enough with 3? Eventually the kids will suffer from you having so many. I think you should stop.’ Great. Thanks for your opinion. I don’t remember asking for it though. 

‘Wow you guys really have your hands full with the kids. I can hardly handle one, 4 is excessive don’t you think?’ No. Actually I don’t think so at all. I can handle my three children just fine. Just because you can hardly handle your one child, doesn’t mean no one is meant to have more then one child. 

‘Oh. I thought for sure you of all people would be done after 3!’

I guess my point is, why are people bothering to ask me if I want to have another baby? Is it to make sure that I’m not? Do people think that I am a bad mom and shouldn’t have kids? Maybe I am being overly sensitive, but right now I am really bothered by these comments.  Most of them come from people close to us. That hurts the most. The strangers who make comments don’t bother me too much, they don’t know me, our situation or anything else. But these comments are from family, friends and neighbors. It makes me wonder if I am making a mistake in potentially wanting to have another baby. Maybe three is too many already.

Normally my attitude is eff them. It’s our life, it’s our choice.  But today, I don’t feel that way. Today I feel like a horrible person for even thinking about wanting another baby. But, it doesn’t change the fact that as complete as I feel with my three babies, I would love to have one more. Maybe soon I will have clarity on the subject. For today, Zoey is 2 months and 1 day old and ready for a bottle.

Love, hugs and more to come later

Lynn

No. We are not having a dance party at Midnight. No.

Last night was one of the worst night we have had in a long time. Of course it was. The timing fits perfectly to have a night like that. The night before last night, hubs and I decided that we are going to cancel his appointment for his vasectomy. Don’t get too excited. We haven’t decided that we are going to have another baby, we just decided that we don’t know if we want another just yet. So of course, opening the door to a fourth child, we would have an absolutely horrid night. (Don’t worry,  I have a coffee here with me and I am gleefully drinking it while I write.)

So last night at 7pm both of the boys were sleeping. And Zoey started crying. She cried until 8pm. At 8 she fell asleep. At 815 she started crying again. On and off until midnight. Gas is a wonderfully amazing thing. We tried everything with her, gripe water, burping, changing, feeding, changing positions etc etc etc. Around 1145 the boys woke up. Of course. Zoey wasn’t crying anymore and she was finally falling asleep.

Since neither of the boys wanted to lie down in their beds, I brought them to my bed to cuddle (and destress) So while the three of us were lying in the bed (Daddy was still rocking Zoey) Alex suddenly sits up and says ‘Mom, dance party?’ The conversation went something like this:

me: ‘huh?’

A: Dance party mom (starts wiggling around) C’mon Nick, dance!

m: um, no guys. We aren’t dancing. It’s bedtime.

A: oh. No bedtime. Dance party.  (both the boys are still wiggling around dancing)

m: (lying them down again) no guys. It’s bedtime, if you can’t lie nice in momma’s bed you are going to go back to your own beds.

A: thanks Mom (which is his way of ignoring what I am saying to do what he wants anyways, saying your welcome to random thank you’s never ever ever ends well with this child…. but I was tired)

m: You’re welcome?

A: Dance party! Oh great!

m: No. Alex. No. We are not having a dance party. Both of you lie down. Nick stop dancing.  It’s midnight. Go to sleep.

A: Alex awake.

m: No. Alex is sleeping.

A: Oh great!

 

It went on like that for a few more minutes until I finally put the boys back in their own beds and Zoey fell asleep so we could go to sleep too. It was a long long night that ended way too soon. The last thing my oh so romantic husband said to me before I fell asleep? ‘So how about that vasectomy?’ How about it indeed.

 

Love, hugs and more to come later

Lynn