I am sure as moms we all know the feeling of feeling guilty over things we really don’t need to feel guilty about. Things that are beyond our control, or things that it is simply unproductive to feel guilt over. This is how I am feeling right now.
On Wednesday I brought Nick in for his 18 month assessment with public health. (Yes, he was 23 months, but some wires got crossed when it came to his appointment as to whether he was supposed to have it or not, it was a headache)
In this hour long assessment they quiz me on his eating habits, sleeping habits, teeth brushing, tv watching, home safety, and development. They then assess him in four areas. Gross motor skills, fine motor skills, speech, and social development.
Each area is scored out of 60, overall Nick did great. His gross motor, fine motor and social skills all scored above a 50. His speech score was a 15.
Now, I have suspected for awhile that there was something off with his speech and ability to talk. I brought this up at his 12 month check, his 18 month check, and to some people close to me that I trust to give me honest opinions. Over and over I was told the same things. ‘He’s just slower in that area.’ ‘He’ll get it when he is ready.’ ‘It’s because he has an older brother.’
Even though my instincts told me there was something up with him, I allowed myself to be convinced. Now we are waiting a 4-6 month wait for him to be seen by a speech therapist. If they determine he needs speech therapy we will need to wait an additional 6 months for him to start getting regular speech therapy. That means he is going to be almost 3 before he is getting help.
I was told that 2.5-3 yrs old is the best time for him to get help. But I still feel guilty. I knew a year ago that he wasn’t where he should be.
I guess that’s Momma guilt for you though.
I have gotten into contact with some friends who have experience with delayed speech and hubs and I have a plan in place to start helping Nick now. I know he will catch up. I guess it’s a little hard to acknowledge your child is struggling with something that was my responsibility to help me learn.
Ah well. Momma guilt. I’ll get over it, and my sweet boy will learn to talk. (He gets a little better every day)
Love, hugs and more to come later!