My negativity is leaking. I apologize in advance.

Why is it that just when I feel like I am on fire from hot flashes (gee I love being pregnant, I mean who doesn’t enjoy having their body temperature sky rocket out of control randomly so all of a sudden you feel like you are sweating out of every single pore OH and your last hair tie broke so you’re hair is touching your neck and THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT) is the exact moment BOTH of my boys feel the need to cuddle UNDER A QUILT with mommy ‘I cold mom, brr, cuddle?’ (really Alex, you’re cold?!? Maybe if you STOPPED TAKING YOUR CLOTHES OFF you wouldn’t be cold?!?) and fall asleep making me 10,435 times warmer then I already was.

And why can’t I say no when all they want is to cuddle no matter how uncomfortable it makes me?!? Seriously. This whole being a good hands on mom thing kind of sucks sometimes. There are times that I am actually a little envious of moms who can pawn their kids off on someone for days at a time and not feel even a little guilty for it. Mostly when I am tired, headachey and feeling like I am going to spontaneously combust into flames at any given moment. Is it still considered spontaneous if I can anticipate it happening? 

I don’t think it would be as bad if Nick didn’t feel the need to wake up every hour all night. Only after midnight though. Before midnight he sleeps awesome. Which would be good for me if Alex would ever go to sleep before midnight. Which he doesn’t. No matter how tired he is. He will keep himself awake until a couple minutes after midnight and then he will roll over and close his eyes. Sigh. I love my kids. I can’t imagine life without them. And I can’t imagine not being a good mom to them. But sometimes, they can make me a little crazy. Later when they are playing nicely together and I don’t feel as though my parents house has turned into a sauna, I’ll smile and  remember how lucky I am to have them in my life. 

 

Love, hugs and more to come later

Lynn

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A letter to my children

Alex, Nick and Zoey, 

I want the three of you to know that you are driving me insane. Yes, Zoey, even you. Even though you aren’t born yet you are proving to be just as difficult as your brothers are. When I lie down in bed at night the reason I am doing so is to sleep. You know, the thing where you close your eyes and your body is completely relaxed without one of the boys deciding that now is a good time to wake up or little miss deciding that now is a good time to work on her cartwheels. When Mommy lies down to sleep, that is your cue to stop making noise, stop moving and sleep as well. 

Another thing I want to bring up with you guys is how important it is for me to eat. Alex and Nick, when you guys get hungry, I go to the kitchen and I make food for you. I serve it to you. Sometimes, I even feed it to you. But I leave you be to eat, I don’t climb into your lap, I don’t whine for a bite. I don’t try to rip the fork out of your hand. I don’t reach my hands into your food to grab myself a taste. So I ask that you please please please not do these things to me anymore either. 

I would also ask that you allow me to go pee on my own without you guys beating on one another. And that maybe you could start picking up your toys. And not throw food at one another. 

I don’t want you to feel as though I am asking too much of you. But these things are common courtesies and I feel that I need to teach you now before you are old enough that it stops being cute. 

Also, my dear boys, you used to nap at the same time. I would greatly appreciate if we can reestablish that habit, as it greatly benefited me and I am desperately missing having my afternoon nap. 

If you can make some of the changes outlined in this letter I feel as though we will be able to live in better harmony and Mommy will have a little more sanity in which to deal with your daddy. 

Love Mommy 

 

To anyone who thought this was going to be a sweet letter to my kids, sorry to disappoint you. 

Love, hugs and more to come later

Lynn

An Update!

It would appear that I am really really bad at keeping this updated while I am in Winnipeg! In my defense though, I am currently down with a cold and also have 2 toddlers with colds. Not my idea of a great time! Definitely makes me appreciate the fact that my mom is here to help me out!!

It’s hard to believe that we have already been out here for a month. The time is flying by! I am definitely missing the Hubs, but the boys are keeping me more then busy and I have enough people around for company (and when I really want someone to cuddle with at night, I have 2 little boys who love to sleep in my bed too!)

I find it insane that in about 2 months we are going to be welcoming our final addition to the family. It’s kind of bittersweet that we are going to be taking measures to prevent having another one. On one hand I am excited to grow and learn as a complete family and not be pregnant anymore… but on the other it’s kind of sad knowing this is the last time that I am going to hold my own newborn, and go through all those milestones that make us moms to happy and sad all at the same time.

Speaking of milestones, I cannot believe that Nick is almost walking! He is taking up to about 10 steps on his own and super excited by the praise he is getting! Hard to believe he is going to be a full year old in less then a week. I also cannot believe how much Alex is talking and how close he is to potty training. He is stubborn like his Momma, but his Momma has more experience at being stubborn and is slowly winning the fight!!

But this Momma is going to put her toddlers to bed and head there herself (after I watch the Jets finish annihilating the Leafs, of course!)

Love, hugs and more to come later! (I promise!)

Lynn

Preschool!!

It’s hard to believe that Alex is at an age where I actually need to think about preschool and kindergarten. At first I was thinking HA he just turned two. I don’t need to think about this stuff. But then since he will be 4 when he starts kindergarten and I want him to have the best start in his schooling life (and he’s so smart as it is, who wouldn’t want to continue building on that!) I decided that maybe it is something I should start thinking about. But honestly, I don’t want to (nor can I afford to) pay the tuition involved in putting him into a preschool. Not to mention, I don’t drive right now and having hubs being responsible for getting him there and back when he also needs to make sure he is at work is obviously too much. (and living in Oromocto, let’s face it, options in walking distance are limited) So what’s a mom to do?!?

Obviously, preschool isn’t necessary. Or mandatory. But in this society, it’s expected. (not that I am by any means one to do what is expected… ever!) I don’t want Alex to start kindergarten being the youngest in his class and also the only one who didn’t have a preschool education. That just leaves me feeling like I am setting him up to fail (I know, I know, that is probably a little melodramatic, but I’m entitled to think and feel how I want!) So I went online and did some research. Parents home school their kids all the time, so why can’t I do that for his preschool education? (and I’m kind of thinking about going beyond that, but hubs and I need to talk about that some more since we have some differing opinions on home vs traditional schooling, so that’s another post for another day!) Enter Google. Google is an amazing tool. It’s amazing what you can find on the internet. I  found a wide variety of preschool curriculum’s and kindergarten prep stuff that I can use at home! And it’s way cheaper to go buy all the supplies I would need then it is to put 3 kids through preschool. As for social interaction (because I know someone out there is thinking to themselves, but Lynn, you are taking away the chance for your kids to interact with other kids! They are going to be socially awkward!) So for social interaction, that my dear friends is where play dates, drop in day care, and library groups come in handy! 

I am really excited for August to roll around so I can start the in home preschool that I am putting together for my kids! (yes, I said August, even though school doesn’t start until September, I want to start a little earlier.) I am really looking forward to giving this a go and maybe convincing the hubs that home schooling our kids is an option worth looking into!

Love, hugs and more to come later!

Lynn